Haha just some random drama for me, i had a girl i really liked well we went out for some time..
Well this is the story (if ever someone's reading), she's someone i met at the uni/school i go to. We hanged out alot and had some good times together. I really liked her (yep alot), although i never told her she noticed it. So anyway.. during the final term of the semester she stopped coming to school. For what reason you might wonder? that i do not know also. Later on i heard from some of her friends she stayed at a relatives place due to some "problems". I tried to talk to her via mails but she just evaded questions. So i was into a blurr and so i just tried to forget her..
A few days ago she randomly sent me an im , ofcourse i was happy that she tried to reconnect with me. She invited me to her birthday, it was her 18th birthday meaning her debut. I was really glad that she invited me to come to her birthday , i tried asking some of my friends that knew her too if they were invited but sadly none of them were. So i was kinda thinking i'd be out of place if i got no one to talk to if ever i'd go there. But i just told myself "ah heck just go for her sake".
After a while i saw a newly uploaded photo album from her. It was a bar trip, she was totally different and she changed back to her old self.. She stopped smoking and yet now she's going at it again. I dont want to say anymore for im in no position to say such things. Anyway i saw her with a dude and all i guess it was over already, i gave up "hope" on her.
So the thing bothering me was "Should i go or not" knowing that i just made up some fucktard-lame excuse. This is one thing i'll pass with alot of regrets i guess. Regret that in the end i couldnt understand her, i couldnt reach her and she couldnt understand what i felt for her i guess (oh fuck yes drama much lmao). To top it off a girl im "evading" in Fb recently added me and went "hi how are you bla bla bla" with a pic of her and her bf lolled.. talk about adding salt to the wound.
Ah well that's life, har har. A song to relate to:
If you're still reading up to this part then let me just tell you, read the english lyrics but change the female parts to a dude (since its a girl song lmao) and yea its pretty much that way for me lol...
English Lyrics:
Melancholic
I cant grasp you at all
That my heart could be taken away
While I didnt notice at all
Theres no way that could happen
There was that unfeeling blank smile
There was that sunset on Sunday
There was that time of year full of tests
There was that melancholist named you
If I plowed forth
With my
Haphazard bluntness
I get the feeling that
There would be nothing
Left in my hand
I thought Id try to
Gain a bit of courage
But I ended up
Shrinking away
And getting stuck
I cant grasp you at all
That my heart could be taken away
While I didnt notice at all
Theres no way that could happen
You dont realize at all
I dont care about you, dont care at all!
Dont give me that hey, hey, my smile
Cant go to sleep again
Tomorrow, will I still
Be the same as always?
Still unfeeling and
Aloof and
Not cute at all?
Ever since you showed up in that dream of mine
I havent been honest at all
After all
I cant grasp you at all
The one who was trying to lose her heart
While she didnt notice at all
Was me after all
Its that sort of time
I want to be drowned in this beloved
Melancholy
Hope you didnt read all through out, i just blogged about it to let go of some of the "emoness" heh..
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